My name is Jen.
I am an adoptee. I was one of the lucky ones in that I have a great adoptive family. Both my adoptive parents have passed away. (my mom las August.) All I have now is my sister.
In 2001 I finally got up the nerve to search for my birth family. I had the help of a group called PAC which stands for Pittsburgh Adoption Connection. It's a search and support group founded by a birth mom. She became a good friend of mine. She gave up her daughter when she was only 17. She still to this day feels she was totally forced into it.
Anyway, my search went really quick. I discovered that my maternal grand parents were still living in the same house.
My birth mother passed away at the age of 27. She was dating a guy who everyone is pretty sure killed her.
My birth father never knew about me. He died when he was 35. Complications from a car accident, diabetes, alcoholism...
My whole life I was always pro-adoption.
But now I definitely lean away from it. I understand why in some instances it can be a good thing, like if the child is in danger living with the birth parents, (Abusive, drug addicts what have you.) But only if no one else in the birth family can take the child.
I think it is so important to know where you came from. I love my family, but wish more than anything my birth mother had raised me.
I never really felt like my name was my name... if that makes any sense. And while no one ever made me feel like i didn't belong, deep down inside I knew something wasn't right.
So that's me in a nut shell, and those are my thoughts...
Poll #1439874
Which part of the triad are you?
Open to:
All, detailed results viewable to:
All, participants: 13
What are you?
View Answers
| Adoptee |
  7 (53.8%) |
| Birth parent |
  1 (7.7%) |
| adoptive parent |
  0 (0.0%) |
| none of the above |
  5 (38.5%) |
Anyone else read the book primal wound by Nancy Verrier?
Thoughts?